Interview - Material World - Vox, May '96

Chris: Peter Stringfellow, because he knows how to throw a party; Elvis and Keith Richards, because they know how to party; plus Steve Strange and Robert Elms on the door to make sure only blondes got in.

Phil King (bass): That's a bit '80s, isn't it?

Miki: We're an '80s band!

Whose names wouldn't be down, and wouldn't get in, no matter who they were'?

Miki: Thatcher! is that '80s enough?

Emma Anderson (guitar/vocals): All my ex-boyfriends' girlfriends.

Miki: Would your ex-boyfriends get in?

Emma: They wouldn't come anyway; their girlfriends wouldn't let them.

All: Whooo!

Emma: Not that I'm bitter.

If the party was fancy dress, what would you go as?

Phil: The Grim Reaper.

Miki: Me and Emma would go as Starsky and Hutch.

Chris: A gorilla.

Miki: Is that because you're eating a banana right now?

Emma: No, it's because he's got a hairy cock!

Chris: Nah, there's always a gorilla at fancy dress parties; there's always two of them, and they always get confused with each other, with hilarious consequences.

Miki: You're thinking of The Pink Panther there, aren't you? When else does that ever happen?

Chris: You don't go to the same parties as me!

What tunes would get the guests frugging?

Chris: 'Atmosphere' by Russ Abbot

Miki: Followed by 'Atmosphere' by Joy Division.

Emma: 'All Coppers Are Cunts' by Hard Skin.

Chris: And we'd have Noddy Holder playing, because he's a top bloke in a top hat.

And which tunes would clear the floor?

Chris: 'Henry's Circumcision' by Lou Reed.

Phil: Anything by Surgical Penis Klinik; anything in my record collection, in fact.

Which is harder to handle, fame or obscurity?

Chris: Obscurity; we've been managing pretty well so far.

Emma: If you were really famous, I think it'd be really hard.

Phil: It wouldn't be a problem for Chris and me because no one knows who we are, but I think Emma and Miki's fame would be hard for us to handle.

Is it great when you date... yeah?

Emma: 'Single Girl' was about how it's not better to be in a relationship, but it's not that great being single. Relationships are a real Catch 22. But mainly it was a song about how it's much better to be single than in a crappy relationship.

Miki: ... Although I do like going out with people, all the time. I'm just not very good at it.

Phil: Well, I like wanting to go out with people; you know, all the yearning, the desire... I just don't like the actual 'going out' part.

What is the most embarrassing thing in your wardrobe?

Miki: A few skeletons.

Chris: My Val Doonican cardigan! I got it in a New York thrift shop; it's lovely - a big red chunky thing with a blue snowflake design, but they all forbid me to wear it.

Miki: You look like Bing Crosby, it's ridiculous!

Phil: The leather trousers I lived in for about five years.

Miki: No, it's those Mickey Mouse boxer shorts you wore on Top Of The Pops! Phil, it has to be said, is the least likely person on earth to wear Mickey Mouse boxer shorts. But when we were on TOTP, he had to get changed, so we saw them and went 'Fucking hell!' They were awful. He still wore them, though.

Who's the most 'lush' human being?

Emma: Christopher Eccleston, the geeky accountant bloke out of Shallow Grave.

Miki: Gary Oldman, pre-Guns N'Roses video appearance

Chris: Liz Hurley, although I don't think I'd fancy her mind. And I'd say Liv Tyler, only she is rather young.

Phil: Liv Tyler definitely.

Chris: Pervert..

When did you last cry?

Chris: I think I shed a tear watching Animal Hospital. Rolf was going (convincing Rolf Harris impression): 'We're gonna haveta puttim down!' And I always find myself going (makes sobbing noise) when the doddery old couple go: 'He had a good life, he had a good innings..'

What do you try not to miss?

Miki: EastEnders.

Emma: Brookside, but I don't want anyone dead. It's not real, you know.

Chris: Spurs matches.

Phil: Star Trek: The Next Generation, and I don't care how sad that sounds.

Emma: My periods.

Miki: Fucking hell, yeah!

What's the most expensive thing you've ever bought?

Phil: I bought a jacket in Japan. It was so expensive, I don't even want to know how much it was. I deliberately bought it in yen and refused to have it converted into real money.

Miki: You crazy fool.

Do you have any fetishes?

Phil: The smacking sound of leather on willow.

Chris: Young Moroccan boys, the sea gently lapping over them. .. Oh yes.

What was your most humiliating teenage experience?

Phil: Being made to kiss the bishop's ring.

Chris: It's more of a childhood one. I was about ten or eleven on the terraces at Spurs singing: 'You're gonna get your fucking head kicked in!' and this copper beckoned me over and gave me a real telling off. I was so hard, I ran behind my brother and burst into tears!

Emma: I had a haircut when I was 11 that made me look like a boy. Everyone thought I was a boy. I was so, so upset.

Miki: The time when I was coming back from a Siouxsie And The Banshees gig and I was dying for a wee. The only place I could find to go was behind this parked car. I was squatting down and the bloody car drove off, exposing me to a huge bus queue across the road. The worst part was I then had to go and join the queue to get the bus home.

Who was your first crush?

Chris: Jane Seymour in Live And Let Die.

Phil: Mine was the same as Jarvis Cocker - Marina out of Stingray. Which is rather worrying.

Emma: Ringo Starr, David McCallum and Mike Yarwood, depending on what character he was playing.

Miki: I always had this thing about cheeky cockney geezers, so mine were The Artful Dodger from Oliver! and, erm... Reg Varney from On The Buses.

What's the most rock'n'roll thing you've ever done?

Emma: Putting my arm through two plate-glass windows at the Lollapalooza party in New Orleans. I went to hospital, but I was so out of it that I ran into the street and tried to flag down every car, thinking they were all taxis. This van stopped and I got in, but it was just some bloke! He could have been a rapist or anything, especially down there in the Deep South.

Chris: Did he go: 'Hello, li'l missy! Ah'm yur friendly neighbourhood rapist!'?

Emma: No, luckily he was very nice and just took me back to the hotel.

Miki: We were doing a signing session in Atlanta during that same tour and I'd spent the entire night drinking tequila slammers. About 15 minutes in, I kept slipping off my stool. I was going: 'I'm OK, I'm fine', then I'd collapse face down on the table. In the end, I had to be carried out, pen still in hand.

Phil: I put my foot through a hotel wall once; I thought it was brick, but it was only plaster. I did cover it up afterwards, though.

Chris: That's not very rock'n'roll, is it? Did you call out the 24-hour plasterers?

Did you have any nicknames at school?

Emma: I was called 'Titch' because I was so small.

All: Oh, is that why?

Miki: Miki Mouse, Metal Miki, Holly Holly Hong Kong, Hong Kong Phooey... There weren't many oriental people at that school.

Phil: Funnily enough, I was called 'Peking' (ie P King)

Chris: I was 'Titfer', as in 'Chris-tit-fer'. That was an hilarious five years.

Do you have any famous friends?

Phil: A bloke from The Bootleg Beatles.

Miki: Russell from Moose is about as famous as mine get.

Chris: Justin from Elastica. We ring each other up and say: 'Hello? is that Justin from Elastica? This is Chris from Lush.'

When did you realise that you'd finally made it?

Chris: When we appeared on Top Of The Pops for the first time. It's the only time you can ring your mum and she'll understand that it means something. If you ring her and say: 'Mum, I've just done an interview in VOX!' she'll just go: 'Oh, that's nice, dear!'. It makes things a lot easier with taxi drivers, too, because when you tell them you're a musician, the first thing they'll ask is: 'Have you ever been on Top Of The Pops?' It's great when you can smirk and casually say: 'Oh, of course! We were on last Thursday.'

If you had to chat someone up at a party, what approach would you take?

Miki: The pissed approach; I'd have to be really pissed. I'm crap at it.

Phil: I've only ever done it once. I was stuck on a ferry for five hours and I was so bored, I thought: 'Sod it! I'll give it a go'

Chris: How did you do?

Phil: Ree-sult! But I think I just wore them down.

Chris: I'd get a mate to sidle over for me and say: 'My mate fancies you'. If I had to actually go up myself, I'd start with: 'Oh yes, I have been on Top Of The Pops - before you ask!'

Miki: ... Or stand near them laughing really loudly. That always works.

Chris: Yes! Just standing by them and laughing: 'Top Of The Pops! Ha ha ha! Justin from Elastica! Ha ha! Noel and Liam! Great friends! Ha ha!'.

If you were invisible for one day, what would you do?

Chris: I'd rob a bank, but you'd be able to see the money floating away, wouldn't you? So I'd go flashing in the park! I'd be the world's shyest streaker!

Miki: You could put a sock on it, so everyone could see it. Or wear one of those luminous condoms and terrorise people on the underground!

Lush were trying to impress John Perry